So this snazzy suit will push me into traffic when I want to stop at a red light?

Has it got wifi (ostensibly to allow a remote to find it back, for the lazy/frail of mind), so it can be hacked and someone can make me kick a cop?

Bones and skulls as they will be broken, or underused.

Mine is the leather one.

because the battery in my battery powered speaking assistance device is flat.

I bet Paris doesn't need anything to help her control her legs.

WOW, pictures of a guy.... walking!!!!

Whatever next?!?!

... deeply disappointed that this turns out not to be a device for keeping your Bulgarian airbags in place.

Also,

>"but we like the idea of hacking the code to create a Steve Austin-style bionic running rig."

I suspect this would be more like a lunge-you-forward-and-smack-your-face-into-the-floor-at-the-touch-of-a-button rig, in practice. Maybe we could get Homer to be the test pilot?

Can I set it up to get me home when I have been out on the shandies? It would be great to be able to fall asleep on the way home and wake up outside the front door.

and they have gone all wrong!

I guess walking's patented too now then.

Oh, who am I kidding? I'm a software developer. I never walk anyway.

D'you think they could tie this into their recently announced crime stat warning GPS thingie? You know, audible beeping and a voice warning you that "12 people have been mugged in this dark alley in the last 5 days, please choose an alternate route".

Device won't let you unlock the front door unless you've got it on. Then won't let you go anywhere near the court order has banned you from. And, keeping to to SF tradition, if you try to fiddle with it it blows your nuts off.

Finally it makes sure you go down to the nick when there's a free cell for you.

"Can I set it up to get me home when I have been out on the shandies? It would be great to be able to fall asleep on the way home and wake up outside the front door."

This has already been invented. Have you never come across a beer scooter?!

Extract from the Oxford Made-Up dictionary

Beer Scooter: Unknown vehicle which is the ONLY explanation of how you got home last night whilst drunk .

This is obviously only the beginning. I envision drinking trousers for the legless.

"If I could walk THAT way..."

[silenced by the upraised forefinger of John Cleese]

On a Brit website I can't believe that I, a card-carrying Yank, am the first one to state this.

Mine's the one emitting awful strains of John Philip Sousa.

imagination and design magic.....from the Apple of the Car Industry.

Compare and contrast with the humdrum Toyota.

In this age of global warming and obesity, I'm surprised that yet another gizmo has been designed to waste electricity and reduce physical activity.

What we really need is the ability to charge up a power pack using energy from walking. Positive steps towards reducing both obesity and global warming. That's what I'd call "Techno-Trousers".

P.s. Have you seen this chicken?

* Dave Lister: Sometimes I think it's cruel giving machines a personality. My mate Petersen once brought a pair of shoes with artificial intelligence. Smart Shoes, they were called. It was a neat idea. No matter how blind drunk you were, they would always get you home. Then he got ratted one night in Oslo, and woke up the next morning in Burma. See, the shoes got bored just going from his local to the flat. They wanted to see the world, man, y'know? He had a helluva job getting rid of them. No matter who he sold them to, they'd show up again the next day! He tried to shut them out, but they just kicked the door down, y'know?

* Arnold Rimmer: Is this true?

* Dave Lister: Yeah! Last thing he heard, they'd sort of, erm, robbed a car and drove it into a canal. They couldn't steer, y'see.

* Arnold Rimmer: Really?!

* Dave Lister: Yeah. Petersen was really, really blown away by it. He went to see a priest. The priest told him, he said, it was alright, and all that, and the shoes were happy, and they'd gone to heaven. Y'see, it turns out shoes have soles.

A nifty piece of technology developed many years ago to help the grammatically challenged succeed in life, there are many options to choose from, and some are cheap too! so cheap that i'm sure even el reg can afford to buy you one...

Its ASIMO! not Asimp...

Mines the one with the Merriam-Webster electronic dictionary in the pocket...

A nifty piece of technology developed many years ago to help the grammatically challenged succeed in life, there are many options to choose from, including versions built into some word processors, and some are FREE too! Even Walter Brown can afford to buy one...

It's So! Not so... first words of sentences are capitalized...

It's El Reg! Not el reg... it's a proper noun

It's I'm! Not i'm... dumbass... I'm not exactly sure of the specific reason for that though...

Its Mine's! not Mines... possessive noun... do you understand any of these words?